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The People Gardener Podcast with Rhonda Delaney
The People Gardener Podcast with Rhonda Delaney
Embracing Personal Growth for Business Triumph
Ever felt like you're constantly being held back by your own mind? This week on the People Gardener podcast, I share a transformative and deeply personal story that might resonate with many business owners and leaders. During an intensive retreat led by my coach James, I uncovered a profound personal barrier: the belief that "you're not ready yet," which I'd internalized from a past injury. This realization made clear how much this subconscious narrative has been sabotaging my business endeavors. We discuss the significant impact of recognizing and challenging these internal stories to unlock your true potential.
In addition to personal growth insights, stay connected and informed about people, gardening, and leadership topics by subscribing to my email list. Explore the Raving Fans Society app for even more resources. The paid membership offers a treasure trove of content, including teaching materials, a resource library, monthly group coaching, and quarterly guest speakers. At just $49 a month, it’s an investment in your journey to becoming an outstanding leader. Don't miss out on these valuable tools and join us next week for more enriching discussions.
Well, hey there, welcome to the People Gardener podcast. I'm Rhonda Delaney, your host, also known as the People Gardener, thrilled to put this podcast together to help small business owners, new business owners, frustrated business owners and aspiring leaders, whether they're inside business or outside. Each week, we bring you some actionable steps so that you can actually improve your skill as a leader. That's what we're about. We're here to help you become a better leader by giving you access to lots of different perspectives. By giving you access to lots of different perspectives. The guests are varied. We're thrilled to have them. Get out your pen, get out your paper and be ready to learn Every single episode. You're going to be able to take something away that you can implement. Are you ready? Let's get to work. Well, hey there. Welcome back to the People Gardener podcast. Happy to have you here. This week we're going to talk about growing pains. Something that I'm sure you understand and have experienced is, as a business owner, the need to grow. As a business owner, the need to grow, there's skills that you need to learn. There's programs that you maybe need to look into to try and facilitate having things flow better. There's so many ways for us as human beings that not only we can grow, but it's in our best interest to grow.
Speaker 1:Last week I was at a conference, a retreat business owner, my coach James at his next level retreat and two solid days. We started at nine in the morning on Thursday. We went until 1030 at night. We had a 90 minute lunch break and a 90 minute dinner break and that was it. And he said you come in and out as you feel like you're able. But it was all of this inner work, lots of internal processing, meditating, just sitting in silence and thinking it was heavy. And then the next day we started at nine and we went till 8.30. We had a 90-minute lunch break but no dinner break, and so we had a 90 minute lunch break but no dinner break, and so we had something to eat after the 8 30. It was so intense, but lots of growth.
Speaker 1:There's things that I came to understand were holding me back, or I was using as a crutch, let's say as a reason, as an excuse. Well, one of the things that came up was when I was 20, I was in a car accident, but a pretty significant one. I spent a week in hospital and then I spent the next nine and a half months on crutches. I shattered my leg in 11 pieces, just above the ankle. So my ankle's fused. It doesn't, doesn't bend.
Speaker 1:So the reality is there was huge change in my life. I was a very athletic person, very active person, and this was, yeah, everything ground to a halt. But what came up for me in these couple of days is every month I would go in and the surgeon would take a I call it a rainbow scan of my bone. He wanted to know was healing, the density of it and Could I get rid of these crutches? So every month I went in there with hope in my heart that I was going to be able to get rid of the crutches. And Every month it was dashed. And so the next month went in same thing, next month, and I I was I mean hope hadn't been destroyed, but it sure got beat up because I kept on.
Speaker 1:Well, the things that I learned and that I grew during that time was I learned that it was no problem hopping on my right leg. I didn't have to use the crutches all the time. I got an incredibly overdeveloped right quadricep, but I could crawl, I could scoot along on my butt. If I didn't want to use these crutches, there's options. So often we think we're stuck in something when, if we just stop for a minute and look at it differently, then there may be possibilities of doing things just that little bit different.
Speaker 1:That wasn't the aha moment for me. What was is finally coming to the realization that I had internalized the you're not ready yet, as in my leg, my bone. Every month I went in not yet, not yet, you're not ready yet, you're not ready yet. And for some reason and don't ask me to get into my own psyche to understand where this is coming from but it was so clear to me in these couple of days where there was all this inner work happening, that's what I have been doing in my own business you're not ready yet, you're not ready yet. All of these little roadblocks that I put up myself oh well, don't do that. You're not ready yet. Oh well, no, you, you, you shouldn't go here because you're not ready yet. I was, I was and have been basically sabotaging my own business because internally, my subconscious is telling me yeah, you're not ready yet. And so you could, I, I would have this idea. Oh no, you're not ready yet, so yet.
Speaker 1:So now that I know that, and now that I'm aware of that, I have to work at changing the inner dialogue and making sure that I am telling myself you are absolutely ready. You're ready to do this. You have 65 years of life experience. You've got all of these years in leading people and creating cultures and building teams. You have so much to share, so get out there and share it.
Speaker 1:So my question to you is what is your subconscious telling you? What has it been saying to you? What are some of the ways that you could grow that you haven't been, that you maybe haven't even looked at the other thing that I got thinking about in this growth. So for me, that part of it is okay. For me, that part of it is okay listening. I need to grow in listening to my inner self, my subconscious, and what it might be telling me. That is not true, because I'm not going to completely discount my intuition, right. I mean, I think we all need to lean into our intuition when it's telling us something. Just yeah, believe it and go for it. But I know for myself, something that I have had to grow into and it's been incredibly painful is letting go of control. I still find it quite challenging.
Speaker 1:But a couple of instances really come to mind in my life. The first is our oldest daughter is asthmatic and she started having asthma problems when she was about two and a half and we almost lost her three or four times. Her blood oxygen got so low In fact, once the ambulance came here to the house and she was in the 70s, 70 percent, and I mean you should be up at 99, right 100, and it was. It was terrifying, and so what I did, which drove her nuts, is I would put controls in every place that I thought I could. That would do the most to mitigate any possibility that she would have an asthmatic reaction. So in the spring, when the grasses and the cottonwoods were flying, I would, you know, try and have her indoors. If it was at the lake, if you're swimming at night, you got to dry your hair because if you get a cold then it's going to go into your chest.
Speaker 1:I, I threw throughout this and as she grew up, I learned how to just be okay and and working with myself. Look, you're 30 minutes from the hospital. She has her inhaler, she has her nebulizer and things will be okay. But oh, it's so hard. We have to practice where we need to grow. It's not just going to all of a sudden we're going to be patient or all of a sudden we're going to be happy not having control. We have to go through all these things and really work at them and practice until they actually become something that is kind of innately in us. We become that person who is happy to let go and be at peace. And yeah, I have, I have been at peace.
Speaker 1:Another thing same daughter with her addiction. Oh man, it was so, so difficult. I mean, as a parent, you want to be able to fix and solve all the problems, right, but you can't. It just is not possible, nor would it be helpful. And working through that, just stepping back and being okay, I mean I felt guilty because the trust was totally destroyed, right, and you feel like you're such a horrible person that you don't even trust your own child. You don't even trust your own child. But by not trusting I was actually helping, set a boundary that, as we progressed through it was helpful for her. We have a wonderful relationship now she's got three kids and beautiful.
Speaker 1:But it was a process and I absolutely could not have the empathy and the compassion for other parents or anyone that has someone with addiction in their life, if I hadn't gone through this. And so I actually grew and I became okay with not trusting. For me, that just oh, that just hurt. That was such a horrible, horrible place, and it's like, oh, that is ugly, no, you should trust, and it was like, no, no, you shouldn't. There's evidence that you shouldn't. And being getting to the place that you're okay with all of these emotions and thoughts and feelings that you may have judged prior to this situation as being very, very negative, unkind, and you all of a sudden start judging yourself Not helpful at all.
Speaker 1:So my question to you is are you growing In order for your business to grow? You have to grow If you want to move to the next level, whether that's 100,000, 250,000, a million, you are going to have to become the person that can actually handle that size of a business, that number of employees, and so you personally have to grow yourself. And so what are you doing to grow? And so what are you doing to grow? It was profound, this learning that I had. Yeah, what are you learning? How are you growing? What's your next step? That's it for this week. We'll talk to you again next week.
Speaker 1:Well, thanks for joining me today. Just a quick reminder if you were not on my email list, go to my website, rondadelaneycom, and there's a place there that you can subscribe, keep you up to date on all things people, gardening and leadership. And also a reminder that the Raving Fans Society app is available on the Apple Store and the Google Store. I do have a free membership in there that you'll be able to access some of my material, and then there's also a paid membership, and right now it's $49 a month, and you will receive access to all of my material, all of the teaching content, including a resource library that will really help you along, as well as group coaching every month and then quarterly bringing in guests that will talk on topics that pertain to small business owners and leadership. Thanks again for listening and we'll see you again next week.