.jpg)
The People Gardener Podcast with Rhonda Delaney
The People Gardener Podcast with Rhonda Delaney
Balancing Personal Challenges and Professional Life: Strategies for Leaders
What happens when personal distractions seep into professional life? Join me on the People Gardener podcast as I recount a poignant experience that tested my ability to juggle personal and business responsibilities. Housing a woman in a domestic violence situation became an emotional whirlwind, pulling my focus away from work and leading to a profound reflection on setting boundaries and finding balance. I share insights from my corporate past and offer strategies to help you mentally reset, aiming for effective management of life's unpredictable challenges.
Discover practical steps to curb distractions both personal and professional, and see how flexibility and adaptability can be key when initial solutions fall short. I open up about my journey of minimizing disruptions, hoping to inspire you to reassess and fine-tune your approaches too. Stay connected and informed about people, gardening, and leadership by signing up for my email list on rondadelaney.com. Plus, explore the Raving Fans Society app, a vibrant community full of resources and coaching for small business owners and leaders. Let's navigate these distractions together and continue our conversation on leadership in the coming weeks.
Onboarding with Ease FREE download
Well, hey there, welcome to the People Gardener podcast. I'm Rhonda Delaney, your host, also known as the People Gardener, thrilled to put this podcast together to help small business owners, new business owners, frustrated business owners and aspiring leaders, whether they're inside business or outside. Each week, we bring you some actionable steps so that you can actually improve your skill as a leader. That's what we're about. We're here to help you become a better leader by giving you access to lots of different perspectives. By giving you access to lots of different perspectives, the guests are varied. We're thrilled to have them. Get out your pen, get out your paper and be ready to learn Every single episode. You're going to be able to take something away that you can implement. Are you ready? Let's get to work. Well, hey there. Welcome back to the People Gardener podcast. Happy to have you here. We are just going to have a very real conversation today.
Speaker 1:I want to share something that's been happening in my life and I'm sure it's happened in yours. I know what's happened in my life in the past, especially when I was working in corporate. What I'm talking about is navigating personal distractions, things that are happening in your life that are affecting you emotionally, mentally and how to navigate, mitigating the impact that it might have on your business. It's not possible for us as humans to just be on all the time, because life happens, there's things that affect how we see ourselves, how we do our job. So I'm going to share a story that's happened in my life in these last two months and it absolutely has impacted how I've shown up in my business or the real word is I've not shown up. Met a young girl young, being early 40s age of our daughters right Someone that we've known for a lot of years. Come to us needing shelter, domestic violence, situation and absolutely we're happy to set her up. Our motorhome was here, it's perfect, so she has her own space and we got the groceries and did the whole thing. So this has been the last two months. What has happened is my horror. My mother's heart is breaking for this woman and all that she is going through.
Speaker 1:All of the things that have happened really, really ugly, traumatic things and in my effort to support because I'm a fixer by nature my DNA it's all about. You bring me a problem. Okay, let's look at it, let's look at the facts, let's figure out what the next step is going to be. So for this. I am completely unequipped. The legal system is filled with complexities, inconsistencies, outright dishonesty there's just so much, and you're looking from one to the other trying to figure out who to believe. And so what has happened is, in my effort to support, I have just become so emotionally invested and doing research and doing all sorts of things, and so my life has become distracted. My life really has become one-dimensional. And this morning I was talking to Trev and I just said you know what? I can't go on this way. I was actually shaking yesterday with all of the things that were happening and everything that was being thrown at her and it was like no, I cannot sustain this. I need to put some boundaries and I need to step back. Not that I'm not going to support, but I'm going to find a different way of doing it that works with my life and my business, and this is one of the challenges that you have as a business owner. Things are happening in your personal life Could be family related, it could be illness. It could be that you're taking a course, you're trying to up your skill in something, and you have a distraction there because it's time away from the business. It's like okay, well, how do I navigate this? What do I do?
Speaker 1:When I worked in corporate, our oldest daughter was going through drug addiction and we thankfully just side note, she's out the other side. We got past that, but while it was happening something that I did every day when I would arrive at the office because my mind was just racing with all of this those of you that are working with anybody or supporting anybody in addiction trust has absolutely been decimated. Because of the lack of trust I started, the wheels would just be turning Okay, what's next? What's going to happen next? What's she going to do? You know and it's a little worst case scenario, but still, that's how my mind went. And so what I would do when I got to the office, I would pull into my parking spot and I would just sit in my car and I would let go of the thoughts that were racing all over the place. I would settle myself, I would breathe. I would settle myself, I would breathe and I would actively change my thinking to how can I serve my team today, I walk in the door, I do my morning hello.
Speaker 1:There's no question that my team knew I was not myself. I wasn't concerned about hiding it per se. Many of them knew specifically, a lot of them didn't, but many did and I would go about my day focused on trying to serve them and it worked for a while, and then I'd be at my desk and the brain would start shedding off in another direction. I'd be going in my mind. All of a sudden I turn around and I look and there's somebody in my office and they had actually said, hey, rhonda, blah, blah, blah, and I never heard it, completely distracted in my mind from the work at hand. It took a lot of time to actually become good managing that particular distraction. It's possible. It's never going to be perfect. Don't expect it to be perfect, but it is possible.
Speaker 1:So my question to you is how do you navigate the personal distractions in your life? Are you even recognizing them distractions in your life? Are you even recognizing them? Like, it took me two months here with this, with this gal that's living with us, for me to recognize whoa you are distracted from your life and your business. You need to get back on track. So are you even recognizing that you're distracted track? So are you even recognizing that you're distracted? Once you recognize that, how are you going to address it?
Speaker 1:One of the things that I have determined in my particular situation now I wouldn't have done this in my role in corporate, but in this particular situation it is to not invite by asking questions. Happy to participate if she comes to me and says what do you think? But not checking in, what did so-and-so say? What did this lawyer say? How's this going? Did you remember that? Because that's me. I just it's like I want to make sure all of the I's are dotted and the T's are crossed and you know you're doing everything you can to try and help the situation. That's what's getting me in trouble. So I need to back off from that Now. When, at work my role, I was managing five different departments and you know 50 to 100 people depending on the time of year. So it's not that you stop asking questions, because, as a leader, you want to be asking questions, because you want to be interested in knowing what's going on and how you can help them.
Speaker 1:So how do you navigate the personal distractions? The number one place is to actually recognize that you have them and it could be that the distraction isn't a problem. It could be very small. It's there but it's not impacting you fulfilling your role as the business owner, as the leader. It might mean you need to go and get counseling. You might need somebody to help you navigate the distraction. It could be that you need to call a team meeting and just say, okay, look, got things happening in my life. I know that I've been distracted. I can't promise that tomorrow I'm not going to be distracted.
Speaker 1:If you're feeling like I'm ignoring you or that what you have to contribute doesn't matter, that is not the case. It is me, it's all on me, taking ownership for not being 100% yourself and that there is distraction. That's another option for you. Talking with your peers at work, having a support network at work, and whether or not that is department heads, it could be. If you have a partner, it could be the partner.
Speaker 1:But being honest and open about what's going on. And open about what's going on, you can do that without getting into all of the nitty-gritty details. You can just make them aware that there is a situation and that you want them to be aware of it. It basically cut you some slack or hold you accountable for what it is that you said you're going to do to mitigate the circumstance. Because, man, we are all so human. We all have different situations that happen in our life, and none of us should expect anyone to not be impacted by what's going on in their private life impacted by what's going on in their private life.
Speaker 1:I don't have the answers. All I know is that it became really apparent to me that I was massively distracted in my life and in my business. For me, I have determined what actions I'm going to take in order to reduce the impact, and we'll see if it works. If it doesn't, then I'm going to have to punt and I'm going to have to figure something else out, and I know that you are more than capable of doing that yourself. That's it for this week. We'll talk to you again next week.
Speaker 1:Well, thanks for joining me today. Just a quick reminder if you were not on my email list, go to my website, rondadelaneycom, and there's a place there that you can subscribe, keep you up to date on all things people, gardening and leadership. And also a reminder that the Raving Fans Society app is available on the Apple Store and the Google Store. I do have a free membership in there that you'll be able to access some of my material, and then there's also a paid membership, and right now it's $49 a month and you will receive access to all of my material, all of the teaching content, including a resource library that will really help you along, as well as group coaching every month and then quarterly bringing in guests that will talk on topics that pertain to small business owners and leadership. Thanks again for listening and we'll see you again next week.